This morning I found this AWESOME carrot dessert stuff waiting for me in the fridge. It's an Indian dish made from carrots, almonds, and milk. Despite having no sugar in it, it was incredibly sweet and had this spicy zing... 

We've been spending time together outside work too. She invited me over to teach me how to make curry from scratch. Her mother-in-law is a salon artist at a women's only salon, where Eastern women can get their hair cut modestly. (Cool, huh?!) She took a liking to me and gave me a bag of henna to play with. Resulting in my innocent white-girl first-attempt:

Anyways, the really beautiful part of this friendship....  Mannu came to America for an arranged marriage, and it's worked out fabulously for her. She and her husband are very much in love. They just celebrated her first anniversary. Dating has been kind of a miserable experience for me (as I think it is for most people), so I've been really curious about alternatives. Thus questions, questions... 

I logged in at my desk today and a chat immediately popped up: 

Mannu: hello my sweet! how r u?

Laura: Super good! How are you beautiful?

Mannu: :) 

Mannu: i am great. i have a question for you!

Laura: shoot

Mannu: would you be interested in an arranged marriage? 

Mannu: i have a cousin in Australia... he's really kind and handsome. and he's really adventurous like you. i've been talking to my parents about it, we really like you. we think it could be a good match

I was shocked. And deeply honored. She had just invited me into her family, to be a part of her loved ones' lives forever. It was the greatest compliment I'd even been given. Caught utterly off guard by the thrilling possibilities, I busted up laughing. Unfortunately Mannu was just a couple cubicles over. 

Mannu: oh no!!!! i knew you would laugh... :(

Embarrassed for her, I quickly calmed down. 

Laura: no no no! I'm deeply honored by the offer

Laura: I'm just REALLY surprised  XD

Laura: I don't know what to say
Laura: ...

Choices determine our fates... We talked for hours about the handsome entrepreneur on the other side of the world. We talked about families and cultural expectations. We talked pros and cons of both arranged marriages and dating. Mannu was very honest with me about everything. Although her marriage was wonderful, she also spoke admiringly of my culture's dating tradition.

I will always be grateful to her for her candidness. =) It takes a true friend to want me to do something very badly and yet encourage any choice I want. 

It was tempting. It was really tempting. 

In the end, there were three big reasons that held me back. 

1. We had different religious backgrounds. Although I respect and admire Mannu's faith, I also love my own. Marriage within the covenant is a big deal in my church. And my family would never understand.
2. The Fates that whim my dating life are being tantalizingly kind at the moment. Although nervous, I'm also feeling happy and loved. I want to see current stories through to the conclusion before suddenly giving up on them. 
3. If arranged marriage worked out well, I'd be thrilled. I'd recommend it to all my friends. But if it didn't---if I wasn't totally in love---I would stay faithfully, but I would hate myself for a long time for making a gamble when I was blessed with a choice. 

When I get to heaven and we get to do replays of our lives, I hope I'm proud of the discrepancy.

For now, I feel grateful. My parents have given me a lot of freedom and trust, letting me choose on my own. And even though dating is still hard, I don't resent it as much as I did.

I'm glad to be where I am. =) Given the choices available to me, it's where I want to be.

And I freaking love you, Mannu.