As a Customer Service Representative for a crooked home security company, my job is usually to make people feel better about problems I cannot actually solve. We have company-sponsored lessons on how to keep the phone calls from affecting our emotions. (In other words, we're a team of unsympathetic robots. Hope your problems fix themselves, sucker, 'cause we sure won't

My Nathan brother always wanted to be abducted by aliens. He is also infamous for saying, "I believe in love the way most people believe in aliens. It's possible, but it won't happen to me." His girlfriend called me. Girlfriend: "Laura! I want to abduct Nate dressed like aliens, but I don't know what to do after that. I appeal to the unspoken girl code to demand your assistance!" Laura: (smirk,

I previously introduced you to my coworker friend Mannu! Well, she's turned out to be a total sweetheart. She indulges my endless curiosity about her culture, answering long strings of questions like a saint. She even lets me taste her authentic homemade Indian lunch and makes treats for me... ^_^ This morning I found this AWESOME carrot dessert stuff waiting for me in the fridge. It's

Despite the dismal ambiance, my job has perks. Either the HR lady is sympathetic to our situational predisposition to apocalypse-initiating levels of depression or they are afraid that we'll take our angst out on every third customer that calls, therefore alienating our very lucrative customers. Stupid customer of the day, trying to convince me that she shouldn't be held liable for

Leo ripped his toe shoes. =( Hearsay said he was out hiking, and saw a lizard. Suddenly overcome with the boylike whims that compose the majority of his being, he gave mighty chase! Alas, the lizard had booby trapped his territory with growing things like unto bushes and rocks. I dunno if he ever got the lizard or not, but he was so saddened by the rip in his beloved shoes that he abandoned

Yesterday I purchased arugula lettuce because it was on sale. Today  packed a salad for lunch. Arugula lettuce tastes terrible. (I did not know this). Fortunately, it also looks like seaweed... Click to view larger  All the 'podes snuck home! (except Parky, who is still having a ninja adventure on Leo's Kawasaki.) We spent the better part of 5 hours taping limp lettuce to my cubicle's

Bahaha! Barky lurketh in dark corners and devious places (startling me this morning. ^_^ )  He came to work with me and was wonderful company. I think there are more of them playing hide-and-go seek around the apartment. Tonight Diddle Doo was also discovered very cleverly camouflaged in a blue dolphin statue thingy.

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Parky found Leo's motorcycle parked at a friend's apartment today and snuck out of my bag to hitch a ride. He actually fits pretty snugly  in there... haha... Leo's been driving around and he's still got a little green passenger. I don't think he'll fall off anytime soon.

I hiked a mountain by myself, because I missed nature. (Is only been one week since heart surgery.) My muscles got tired before my heart did... First time ever. THAT was a beautiful moment. Recovery has been a breeze.  Nathan brother is mad at me. He called me an idiot because he loves me. In other news, I found this rock! It looked nommy. I tried to make the face a little more

I like being an adult, because I can play with my food and nobody tells me not to.  In case you ever wondered, there IS such a thing as a sweet and sour sandwich.  When you cook for one, no hungry people are hovering over your shoulders like hyperventilating hyenas, wondering how soon dinner will be ready... So I can take as long as I want to prepare it. When

Walmart does this awesome thing called price matching. It works like this:  Crappy produce store gets in a shipment of half-rotten fruit that they know they are going to have a hard time selling.  Crappy produce store marks down said fruit and advertises it in the paper, to con people into coming into their story and buying the produce that will mold in their fridge in two days.  Best

It's my first day back at work! It's been 3 days since my heart surgery and I feel like I've been transported into someone else's body. You know what's really weird? I can feel my body metabolizing food differently. I have more energy. Even though I'm obligated to avoid anything strenuous for a month, I feel like I could run a marathon. I want to lift weights and climb trees and do Jujitsu... but

I walked out of the hospital at noon today. Heart surgery was yesterday at 9am. Friend Danielle spent the night with me at the hospital and was kind enough to bring me home. Less lucid today, but I feel INCREDIBLE. There is a core strength in my body that I've never felt before. It's like someone gave me rockstar abs and a spine. I didn't realize I'd feel a difference this soon. The incisions are